Sing It! It’s Your Beagle. Bring Me a Snack!

It’s your beagle. Bring me a snack! (roo, roo, roo, roo)
Are those your hotdogs? Ames would like a pack… (roo, roo, roo, roo)
Give Ames two pieces of ham drenched in clover (roo, roo, roo, roo)
But if you ask Ames he will not roll over.
It’s your beagle, I’m so alone (roo, roo, roo, roo)
I’m gonna whine until you throw me a bone (roo, roo, roo, roo)
I hope you make your magic birthday cake
It’s your beagle, let’s have a clam bake!
It’s your beagle, bring me a steak
Make it the rarest steak that you can make.
Give Ames your word that it is not a leftover
Then tell him that his hungry days are over…

Fan Mails from Boston, Beaglechusetts

Q: What is your dream job?

A: Oh boy, that’s a tough one. When Ames was little Ames wanted to be a paw model but then he realized he wanted to be valued for more than just his incredibly exquisite features so Ames spent most of his time refining his palette in the hopes of becoming a food critic.

The most recent food Ames reviewed was a leg of ham. Ames’ review was featured last month in the New York Beagle: “… the holiday roast started with a honey maple brown sugar glaze and finished moments later inside Ames’ tummy, much to the chagrin of the cats and to the bewilderment of the humans…”

Mostly Ames borrows food from his humans to review when they aren’t looking. The strangest food Ames has ever reviewed was probably whipped cream. For some reason, Ames’ human likes putting it on Ames’ nose.

*eye roll*